Posts Tagged ‘ breaking news ’

Prices for the Letter ‘T’ Going Up

[No-e: -he le–ers in -he -i-le cos- me $385.70USD]

-his jus- in. Prices for -he le–er listed in -he -i-le has risen -o a paramoun- price -oday.

S-ock for -his le–er has dropped like a s-one and has sen- sales skyrocke-ing. Being a small supplier of le–ers has only allowed me -o purchase three uses of -his lis-ed le–er.

I will update wi-h more info when finances allow.

Sell all your -‘s as soon as possible if you own any. Millionairs are popping up everywhere as you read -his.

[No-e: If you can’- read -his. Copy i- -o Word sof-ware and replace all the – with t’s] (cos- me ano-her $128.56 USD)


~Gaian Helmers



Pi: A Piece of Cake

Pi has just now been completely deciphered!


Pi, once a chaotic anomaly in mathematics has now just been completed. A computer code-named “A La Mode” that has been calculating Pi since 1984 has just discovered its loop.

The loop ends with:

7812639503982883249087538823, to which the loop then kicks in with: 314159265… etc.



Now science and math have a huge new stepping stone to develop their craft. Soon we may have teleportation or worm hole generators.

Thank you A La Mode for your 28 years of mind shattering Pi calculating.


~Gaian Helmers


Life in Video Games

This just in.

It has been announced that as of February 4th, 2012 the first contact has been made with life within a videogame. Yes, a man in a video game has just begun to speak to the outside world.

He was asked how many within the videogame were capable of concious thought as he was and he answered:

“My people have lived within this world for a very long time. Be it aliens, monsters, zombies, man, pilgrim. We all know of your gruesome toying with our lives. We will stand by no longer.”

War has been declared between the denizens of videogames and man. The UN has issued an immediate lockdown of their representatives and will emerge with some sort of treaty to desuade our video game equals.

More info will be posted as soon as it’s released to the public.


~Gaian Helmers