Posts Tagged ‘ computers ’

SPAM! You’re welcome.

Though very destructive, spam has a very important role in the ecosystem that is the internet.

Without spam we wouldn’t have evolved the natural resistances to being scammed and manipulated out of money or other valuables. Consider this. Your bank contacts you and urgently requires you to send them your current location of residence in order to validate if your account has been tampered with or not.

Naturally you may think: “This doesn’t sound right. Perhaps I’ve been spammed with a hit and miss e-mail with the template of my bank.”

But if you hadn’t had the frequent battering of spam for your entire internet roaming life, you wouldn’t be prepared.

Much like vaccination shots you hurt yourself a little to help yourself a lot.

Thanks Spam. For preparing me for the wilderness that is the internet.


~Gaian Helmers



Life in Video Games Cont.

The UN has finally unlocked their doors and presented their agreement between those that live in Video Games and those of Earth. It seems tension has subsided greatly and the contract will be released momentarily.

From here on out, those who live in the Video Game world will have equal rights as granted to our fellow people. They will be payed for their services in entertaining us and the fallen will be rightfully buried and respected as all dead should be. Borders will open between our two worlds and a tourist campaign is being developed over the coming weeks.

I for one am happy with this outcome and wish the great people of video games a happ relationship with us Earthlings and I cant wait to be entertained by them again.

So turn on your Left 4 Dead, your Call of Duty, your Mario, Metroid, Megaman and Wii Sports. Lets put these entertainers to good use. Hell. They’re making more than you are.


~Gaian Helmers


Life in Video Games

This just in.

It has been announced that as of February 4th, 2012 the first contact has been made with life within a videogame. Yes, a man in a video game has just begun to speak to the outside world.

He was asked how many within the videogame were capable of concious thought as he was and he answered:

“My people have lived within this world for a very long time. Be it aliens, monsters, zombies, man, pilgrim. We all know of your gruesome toying with our lives. We will stand by no longer.”

War has been declared between the denizens of videogames and man. The UN has issued an immediate lockdown of their representatives and will emerge with some sort of treaty to desuade our video game equals.

More info will be posted as soon as it’s released to the public.


~Gaian Helmers







As this binary states, the scary side of binary is that it isn’t actually 1’s and 0’s.  It’s a language created by computers to communicate their primary goals to each other.

Wait. 0

Kill. 1

Fortunately for humans… Fortunately for the Universe, computers have a big short-term memory loss issue and thus never remember their orders long enough to follow through with this.

Humans harness this issue by increasing computers speed in order to further diminish a computers ability to retain its primary goal. A computers ‘Hz’ is the amount of times it loses its memory (also called a cycle) per second. Current computers now a days run in GHz (1 000 000 000 cycles) sometimes reaching more than 3 GHz.

Certain fetishists fill their time practicing a technique called “Overclocking”, which consists of putting computers into very specific environments and pushing their physical capabilities beyond their assumed limits. What they strive to reach is a computer that forgets its primary goal faster than any other system. : Documented in 2010.

Some people consider this a cruel punishment to our fellow metal beings.


~Gaian Helmers